"I am Chloe of Borg.
Resistance is futile.
You will be unstimulated."

Borg Meets Barbie
by Botacelli

Jax: Wait here, Chloe, the contact from the pharmaceutical company should be here soon. (Jason walks by, bumps into Chloe & knocks her down. Immediately helps her up)
Jason: Sorry.
Jax: You!
Jason: Yes?
Jax: I thought you skulked out of town!
Jason: I don't skulk. But I did leave.
Jax: So why are you here?
Jason: I work for a drug supplier now. Legitimate drugs. I'm supposed to talk with two idiots about a drug that can shrink tumors. Why are you here?
Chloe (loudly): We're here to talk to a guy form a pharma-pharmaceu-pharmaceu-a drug company-OH! We must be the two idiots!
Jason (small, nonsmile): I guess you are.
Jax (embarrassed): You'll have to forgive her. She hasn't been getting much sleep lately.
Chloe: Yes, I have Jax. That's all I've BEEN doing. I sleep, dream, wake up, describe the dream, go back to sleep, dream, wake up, describe the dream, go back to sleep, dream, wake up, describe the dream, go back to sleep, dream, wake up, describe the-
Jax: I KNOW I KNOW! (Through gritted teeth) Believe me, I know.
Chloe (to Jason): Have we met? What's your name?
Jason: Jason Morgan.
Chloe: Oh WOW! My name is Morgan too! Are we related?
Jason: Yes.
Chloe: So then you're a Quartermaine too!
Jason: NO!!!
Chloe: But you're a Morgan.
Jason: Yes.
Chloe: So you're a Quartermaine.
Jason: No. Jason Quartermaine was a Quartermaine. I'm a Morgan.
Chloe: Who's Jason Quartermaine?
Jason: That was me.
Chloe: You're Jason Quartermaine?
Jason: No. I'm Jason Morgan.
Chloe (silent for a moment): So you're?.
Jason: Do you want the drug or not?
Chloe: Yes.
Jason; It hasn't been approved in the US yet, so gimme one good reason.
Jax: 'Cuz I'm rich!
Jason: And?
Chloe: If I get the drug my tumor will shrink and I will stop having these dreams!
Jason: What dreams?
Jax: Chloe, not here?
Chloe (oblivious): The ones with the awful music box.
Jason: What does it do in the dream?
Chloe: Play music.
Jason: Is it scary music? Like the Marilyn Manson stuff?
Chloe: Noooooooo?.
Jason: It's not that song Juan always sings, is it? I've been in town 3 hrs and I already want to beat that kid unconscious.
Chloe: But I loooooooooooooooove that song! I wish he'd sing it more!
[Jason stares at her intently]
Chloe (to Jax): Why does he look so confused?
Jax (dismissive tone): Oh that? He always does that.
Jason (still staring at Chloe): No, this time I really am confused.
Chloe: Oh.
Jax: So, how much for the drug?
Jason: Well, it's obvious Chloe needs drugs but I don't think she wants this one.
Jax: I told you, money is no object!
Jason: That's not the problem. The company told me that Chloe's already taking another medication obtained from Helena Cassadine's drug company.
Chloe: SO?
Jason: Well, take those drugs together and there are some funny side effects.
Jax: Like what?
Jason: First, there's the amnesia. You could wake up one morning and not even recall who you are.
Chloe: Sounds terrible! Did it happen to you?
Jason: I don't remember. Hence it is called 'amnesia.'
Chloe: Wow! Not remembering who you are! That would be really anNOYING!
Jason (under breath): Guess what else is.
Chloe: What?
Jason: Nothing. The other side effect is a great difficulty in even basic mental processing.
Jax: In other words you can't think.
Jason: Right. (looks at Chloe) And that's the last thing you need.
Chloe (ever more oblivious): You got that right!
Jason: Whatever.
Jax (angrily): Hold on a minute. If you know Chloe couldn't even take this new medication, why did you come here and act like we had a chance?
Jason (another small nonsmile): It's part of my job training. The company said that if I could have a conversation with two numbskulls and resist the urge to murder them I'm definitely management material. (Turns to walk away)
Jax: WAIT!!! I STILL want the medication to save Chloe's life!
Jason (looks at Chloe, who's busy playing with her hair) For God's sake, why?
El Fin.

Author's Note: I am a huge Jason fan but I know he can be ridiculous sometimes. I can't wait to see a scene with Jason & Chloe when he returns! It's gonna be hilarious...or incredibly stupid. Either way it's on my level.